Raven Read online

  “Why?” he questioned. “Why does it have to be limited to just a night?”

  Texas turned to face her but made no move to touch her. Remi was thankful for that because if he had, she would have let him, and they’d probably end up in his room again. The only difference was she wouldn’t have Jag there to run interference for her and Tex would ask her for too much. Remi had a feeling he would demand everything from her and she wasn’t sure she was ready to give him or anyone that part of her.

  “There are things about me that you don’t know. If you did, you wouldn’t be asking me for another chance, Tex.” Remi looked out her window, wishing she was anywhere else but in the parking lot at Reckoning.

  “I don’t care about all of that,” he promised. “Come home with me. Talk to me,” Tex asked. Remi knew she should have said no, but when she opened her mouth to speak, she agreed. She fucking agreed.

  Texas

  Texas wasn’t taking any chances that Remi would change her mind. He practically ran every light and blew most of the stop signs between Reckoning and his house. Once Remi gave him her agreement, he couldn’t seem to get home quick enough. He knew she might not be agreeing to everything his dick was hoping she was, but she had agreed to hear him out and hopefully give him a chance. That was more than he expected when he showed up at Tank’s place tonight. Hell, he expected her to tell him to get lost, but she didn’t. She even admitted to her friends and sister that they had slept together. Now, he just needed for her to agree to give him and Jag another chance or his best friend was going to beat his ass when he got home. He promised Jag he’d try and if his unruly cock had his way, he’d do more than just try with Remi tonight.

  He parked his truck in the third garage bay and shut the door. “You sure about this, Remi?” he asked. He didn’t want to even ask her that, but he also wanted to give her one final chance to back out.

  “I—I think so,” she stuttered. “Just talking though,” she said. She honestly looked scared to death and he wanted to pull her onto his lap and tell her that everything was going to be alright. How could he make her that promise without knowing what had her spooked?

  “Sure,” he said. “How about you let me make you something to eat?” he asked.

  “I’m good,” she lied.

  “Well, I’m starving and I’m thinking grilled cheese,” he said. She smiled at him and nearly took his breath away.

  “Nena and I love grilled cheese sandwiches,” she admitted. “My Anali used to make them for me.”

  “Anali?” he questioned.

  “Yes,” she said. “It means grandmother in Navajo.”

  “How about we go on in and I’ll make us some grilled cheese and you can tell me about your grandmother,” Tex offered. He felt like he was holding his damn breath hoping that she’d agree.

  “Sure,” she said. He got out of his truck and led the way into his kitchen, careful not to touch Remi. If he did, he’d do exactly what he had been thinking about doing since finding her standing in Tank’s doorway. He wanted to make her his and prove that they were good together, no matter who was in charge but hell, he wanted her to give him what he needed from her—namely, her submission.

  Remi settled onto a bar stool that they kept by the center island and Texas had to admit she looked damn good in their space. “Something to drink?” he asked.

  “Um, sure—whatever you have,” Remi said. He pulled a couple beers out of the fridge and everything he needed to make sandwiches. He got to work, loving the way Remi watched him. It was nice to have her full attention and honestly, it wouldn’t be a bad idea for them to spend some one-on-one time with her if this thing between the three of them was going to work.

  “Tell me about your grandmother—what did you call her again?” Tex asked.

  “Anali,” Remi said. “She raised Oryana and me after our mom took off.”

  “How old were you?” Texas asked.

  “Um.” Remi smiled.

  “If I’m prying, just say the word. I’m just trying to get to know you a little Remi,” Texas admitted.

  “I’m not used to talking about myself this much,” she said.

  “What do you usually talk about when you’re, you know—on a date?”

  “I don’t,” she said, taking a swig of her beer.

  “You don’t talk?” he questioned. Texas flipped the sandwiches and turned off the burner, giving Remi his full attention.

  “No, I don’t go on dates,” she said. She looked down at her beer bottle, fixated with peeling the sticker off as if trying to avoid eye contact.

  “Look at me, Remi,” he ordered. He didn’t expect her to concede, but when she did, it felt as if his whole world turned right side up. “What do you mean by you don’t go on dates?”

  Remi sighed and looked him dead in the eyes as if accepting his challenge. “I don’t go on dates, Tex. I meet guys in bars, hook-up and we fuck.” His smile was easy although he felt anything but. The thought of Remi meeting up with random guys at the bar and agreeing to go home with them to have sex, had him seeing red.

  “Fuck,” he swore. “You aren’t kidding?”

  “Nope,” she admitted. “So, now you know one of my deepest, darkest secrets. Ready to take me home, Tex?” she asked. He was far from ready to take Remi home, but she seemed determined to push him as far away, as quickly as possible.

  “How about we eat first and then, if you want me to, I’ll run you home after?” he asked.

  Remi shrugged and sat back down on her stool. “Suit yourself,” she said. Texas passed her the plate with her sandwich and she scarfed it down. He barely touched the two grilled cheeses he made for himself, passing her another sandwich from his plate.

  Remi looked up at him like he lost his mind. “I had two burgers at Reckoning. I guess I wasn’t as hungry as I thought,” he lied. Tex watched her as she polished off his sandwich and handed him back her empty plate.

  “Thanks,” she said.

  “Why don’t you date?” he asked. He sounded like a dog with a fucking bone, questioning her the way he was, but he didn’t care. He had to know.

  “It’s just easier that way,” Remi said. “I don’t do attachments and I can still blow off some steam.” He wanted to laugh at the fact that what she was saying sounded like something he or Jag would have said. Except hearing those words come out of Remi’s mouth sounded a whole lot less funny to him.

  “Is that why you like to be in charge?” Tex asked.

  “I don’t know if it’s a matter of being in charge, but I like to feel like I’m the one in control.” Remi gave him her honesty. “I’ve had so much happen in my life,” her voice cracked and he wondered if she would stop talking, but she continued to tell him her story. He rounded the kitchen island and pulled her into his arms, lifting her as if she weighed nothing. “Wait—” Remi protested, “where are you taking me?”

  “Just to the sofa. I want to hold you—nothing else,” Tex said. Remi looked as if she might protest, but Tex held her tightly against his body and damn if she didn’t feel right in his arms. “Go on,” he prompted, settling on the sofa with Remi snuggled onto his lap. He could tell that her rebellious nature had kicked in and she looked like she wanted to tell him to let her up.

  He felt as if he knew exactly where she was coming from, and Tex wanted for her to tell him everything—all of it, every ugly detail.

  “Please, Remi. I just want to know you—all of you. Tell me you want to give this thing between us a chance,” he begged. He didn’t care if he sounded like a lunatic. He just wanted his chance with her. He promised Jag that he’d make things right with her and originally, he was doing it for his best friend. But now, he knew the truth. He was really trying to convince Remi to give them another chance for himself.

  Texas wondered how far she’d let him push her before she told him to take her home. He worried that if he told her his story—the whole thing, she’d never want to see him again. And then there was the jealousy issue that he
and Jag needed to work out if they were going to find a way forward. He had never been jealous of anyone in his life but watching Jag with Remi made him madder than hell. Knowing that she spent the rest of the night with Jag after he stormed out of their room above Reckoning pissed him off.

  He just couldn’t shake the feeling that Remi wanted Jag more than she did him and he had to know. “Do you want Jag more than me?” he asked.

  “What—no,” Remi protested. “Why would you asked me something like that?”

  “I don’t know. I’m being a jealous asshole, maybe. But, I see the way you look at him. You don’t look at me that way, Remi.” Yeah, now he knew he sounded like a jealous asshole. Saying it out loud only drove that point home for him.

  “No, Texas,” she whispered. “You are two very different people and I want both you and Jag. I look at you both the same.” He smiled and nodded but he didn’t believe a word of what she was saying.

  “You don’t believe me, do you?” she asked.

  “No,” he breathed. “But, that is more my fault. I don’t trust very easily and well, I have issues, you might say.”

  “Don’t we all,” Remi breathed.

  “Yeah—tell me,” he demanded. “Tell me everything, Remi. I’m not going anywhere, just give me a chance.” Remi barked out her laugh and he was sure that was going to be the end of their conversation. Disappointed didn’t even begin to cover how Tex was feeling, but then again, he should be used to it.

  Remi

  Remi reached up and cupped Texas’ jaw, loving how his beard prickled her skin. His dark hair and eyes were so familiar to her that every time he looked at her, it felt like she was home. “You’ve been through as much as I have, haven’t you, Texas?” she asked. She could feel it, deep down inside of her, she knew that Texas had a story that would parallel hers.

  “Yes,” he whispered, leaning into her touch.

  “I can see it in your eyes,” she said. “We’re so much alike.”

  Tex smiled, “Is this part of the seer thing?” She shrugged, not quite sure what this was.

  “It’s not how I normally do things, but possibly. The first time I ever met you and Jag, you seemed familiar to me. I thought that maybe I had seen you in a vision—I don’t know, it all seems crazy now. It’s like we know each other, even though we just met.”

  “I feel the same way,” he admitted. Tex stroked back a strand of her long hair from her face and she thought it was the sweetest, gentlest gesture. Texas was big and almost menacing looking. She knew from experience he could hold his own in a fight. When they stormed into that paper factory, to rescue her and Nena, he and Jag fought off the guards like they were nothing. He was a badass, motorcycle riding, hot as fuck, man and Remi had no idea what to do with him or the crazy feelings that were coursing through her body every time he so much as touched her. As if reading her mind, Tex leaned in to gently kiss her lips. He broke their quick kiss and looked so serious she could almost feel his sadness.

  “My mom died just after I was born and my old man decided he liked the bottle better than me,” Texas whispered.

  “Oh, Tex,” Remi soothed. Before she could get another word out, he covered her mouth with his big hand.

  “Let me just get it out,” he barked. “I was put into foster care when I was just a kid. Really, it wasn’t that bad. But, I learned at an early age that I’m expendable. I guess that’s why I crave control as I do and why I freaked out last night.” Hearing Tex lay it all out for her tugged at her heart. She thought he was just being an asshole last night when she refused to let him have her control. They were so much alike in that aspect. “I’m guessing it’s the same for you?” he asked.

  Remi nodded, “Yeah,” she breathed. “My mother took off when Nena and I were little, and we never knew who our father was. Our grandmother and Aunt Joanna raised us. It wasn’t bad, really but when people found out what Nena and I could do, things got crazy. They were showing up on our doorstep, asking for us to find people for them and we didn’t want to put Anali through that. So, we left New Mexico and landed here.”

  “I’m from Arizona. You miss the desert?” he asked. She did, so much.

  “Yes, but this is our home now. I work down at the library, in town and Nena is a personal trainer.” She felt herself make a face when she said that and Texas laughed.

  “Not into the whole fitness thing?” he teased.

  “Not like Oryana,” Remi admitted. “She works out twenty-four seven and can eat whatever she wants. She’s so perfect; makes it hard to be around her sometimes.”

  “Sure,” Texas said, palming her ass. “Oh, I think you’re pretty damn near perfect yourself, Remi.” Hearing him say that was nice, but she felt far from perfect. He couldn’t see what she was hiding on the inside. She was messy and ugly—far from perfection. Remi had become a monster, devoid of all human emotions. She hadn’t let herself feel anything for anyone in so long, she worried that letting Texas in now was a mistake. He was so easy to talk to; she craved his connection.

  “Thanks, but you don’t know me,” she whispered.

  “I’d like to,” he said back. “How about if I tell you mine and you tell me yours?”

  “What—no,” she almost shouted. “I—I can’t. You won’t like the person I am on the inside, Tex,” she warned.

  “Try me,” he said. “Just give me a chance.” God, he sounded like he was begging her and that was the last thing she wanted. She was nothing for him to beg for and once she said the words; once they were out of her mouth, he’d feel the same way about her.

  “I’ll go first,” he whispered. “I served five years in an Arizona state prison for grand theft auto.” Remi didn’t hide her surprise; her gasp was a dead giveaway that she had no clue.

  “You are a criminal?” she asked.

  Texas rolled his eyes and smiled. “I was a criminal. I did the crime and served my time. I got mixed up with the wrong crowd and before I knew it, I was doing dumb shit, like stealing cars.”

  “Yeah, that qualifies as dumb shit,” she agreed. Texas chuckled and tugged her against his body.

  “You think any worse of me, Honey?” he asked. “You want to run for the door and never look back?” Remi thought his question over and honestly, she didn’t His past was just that, past.

  “I’ll reserve judgment, for now,” she teased. “How did you break free from that life after you got out?”

  “Well, I didn’t at first. I was working odd jobs, back in Arizona because no one wanted to hire a felon. Hell, I was spinning my wheels and going nowhere fast. I had a few semesters at a community college under my belt, before I went to prison. I really wanted to go back to school but I had no money and no bank was going to give me a loan. So, I left Arizona. I got on my bike and just rode. I stayed in a town long enough to make some money to get me to the next town and eventually, I ended up in NOLA at Tank’s bar. We got to talking and he introduced me to Jag—the rest is history. Tank gave me a job, tending bar at Reckoning and I patched into the club. He even lent me the money to go back to college, to get my CPA.”

  “Wait,” Remi sat up on his lap. “You’re an accountant?” He nodded his head and she laughed. The idea of the badass biker, putting on a suit and going to work to crunch numbers, was almost too much.

  “Gee, thanks for that, Honey,” Tex grumbled.

  “Well, look at you,” she sounded like she was accusing him of something. “You don’t really look like the kind of guy who works in an office.” She looked Tex’s body up and down, taking in every delicious inch of him and when she finally worked her way up to his gorgeous brown eyes, she realized he was doing the same to her.

  “Tex,” she warned, holding up her hands, pressing them into his massive chest. She could feel his heat through his black t-shirt and quickly pulled her hands back, not trusting her own judgment when it came to the sexy biker.

  “Your turn,” he said. Remi blinked up at him, trying to figure out what the hell he was talking about.


  “My turn?” she asked.

  “Yep—to share,” he reminded. God, the last thing she wanted to do was share the details from her sordid past. She could see right through the game Texas was playing. He was giving her an ultimatum—sex or the truth about her ugly past. Well, she’d give him his truth and then she’d walk away because there was no way he’d want to keep her then.

  “I killed my daughter,” she whispered. She wasn’t sure he had even heard her until she looked up into his eyes, to see the shock and terror she felt every day of her life.

  “Come again,” Tex said.

  Remi sighed. She tried to stand up from his lap, but Tex wouldn’t allow it. He banded his arms around her waist and held her against his body. Fine, if he wanted to do it this way, she’d give him the whole ugly, messy truth while staring him down.

  It had become so familiar to her—the grief and sadness that consumed her daily, she could tell the story without shedding a single tear. For the first few years, she didn’t even speak about her daughter. When she started to finally talk about Aria, she realized just what kind of person she had truly become. She was dead on the inside; incapable of emotions or feelings. She had become the monster her mind told her she was and now, Remi could recount the entire ordeal without any messy emotions getting in the way.

  “Aria was only two,” she said. “I should have seen it, but I didn’t. Hell, do you know how many countless people I saved over the years, seeing their fate before it happened and helping them to change it?”

  “Like you did for Jag, last night?” Tex asked.

  “Yes,” she hissed. “You would think that would win me some kindness from the fucking universe,” she shouted to the ceiling as if trying to let the whole world hear her. But, as usual, the universe didn’t give a shit about her. “Instead, I put my baby into her car seat and didn’t even see that drunk driver coming. My car flipped three times and she was gone before the EMT’s even showed up to the scene.”